Valentine’s Day

I have always had a love/hate relationship with Valentine’s Day. Growing up, I loved Valentine’s Day. I am a girly girl, so I loved decorating my Valentine’s Day box in elementary school and writing out sweet notes for everyone that I knew. I loved the hearts, candy and sparkle that Valentine’s Day brought. I loved especially the candy part. Everyone seemed to be a little bit brighter and have a twinkle in their eyes when it was Valentine’s Day. When I was younger, Valentine’s Day seemed like a time of pause and reflection to tell everyone in our life that we love them and they matter to us.

Then, as I got older a switch happened. I’m not sure exactly when, but Valentine’s Day turned into a day full of expectation or dread. Whenever I was single, I would dread Valentine’s Day, and only be focusing on the fact that I was alone and didn’t have a significant other. I would long for a significant other and lament the fact that I didn’t have a boyfriend to get me roses or chocolate. When I am in relationship, I would feel pressure and expectation looming. What should I get him? What is he going to get me? What are we going to do? Am I doing enough? So, no matter which way I flipped the coin of being single or in a relationship, I was dissatisfied or stressed out when it came to Valentine’s Day.

Currently, it’s freezing here in Austin. The roads are icy and so many events and businesses are shutting down due to the cold weather. My boyfriend and I had plans to go on a picnic at a place called the Lone Oak Barn, We were both excited and had decided that’s what we were going to do for Valentine’s Day weeks ago. But, our picnic was canceled because of the inclement weather. Obviously, this is totally understandable and I wouldn’t want to be outside freezing my ass off just to still go on our Valentine’s Day picnic. But, I still felt a twinge of disappointment and let down. There have been so many things have been canceled this year, that it’s hard not to feel let down when you have something to look forward to.

I let myself be in this pity party for a while. Then, I remember something which is that expectations and not being in the present moment, is what causes all of this suffering in myself and humanity. A quote that I love that I saw on Pinterest says “A secret to happiness is letting every situation be what it is, instead of what you think it should be.” This quote resonated with me deeply, because I feel like I can get caught up in the web of expectation instead of just letting situations be and play out how they are supposed to. When I was a little girl, before I even had all of these perceived “expectations” of what Valentine’s Day was supposed to be, I genuinely enjoyed it. I enjoyed spreading kindness and love to my classmates, friends, and family. I enjoyed wearing pink or red, eating lots of candy and celebrating the people I had in my life. So, the moral of the story is, I’m going to try and lean more into that perception of Valentine’s Day. No matter what my boyfriend and I end up doing, it’s perfectly okay, because I’m surrounded by love and I’m going to be spreading joy and kindness to the people in my life and that’s what Valentine’s Day is all about.